on Apr 03, 2016 @ 10:26 pm|
As most of you ladies know I've been going through a lot lately trying to fix my health issues.
Do any of you have experience or advice with not becoming frustrated with yourself? When I try to do something and am unable to due to illness I get very frustrated and struggle to be kind to myself.
Any advice appreciated!
|. on Apr 03, 2016 @ 10:26 pm|
Over time it gets very difficult not being able to do what you want to. I'm sure some of you wonderful ladies have experienced this also!
|. on Apr 03, 2016 @ 10:38 pm|
It is tough. I went through a period of time where I was very depressed and anxious about everything. It really took its toll physically and emotionally. It's tough not to beat yourself up, I know. I tried to focus on what I could do. And tried once a week to push my limits a bit - whether it was exercising a few minutes longer(or at all), eat a bit healthier, do something I found a bit hard(even for a few minutes). I slowly built up my times and made a few more goals as I felt better. Journaling really helped. Writing, drawing, gluing photos and articles in.
I eventually joined a beginners yoga class one evening a week. It was great. It helped me feel better both physically and emotionally. The teacher was so kind and really helped me with exercises to relieve stress and promote relaxation.
You are on the right track. Focus on what you can do. Don't forget to nourish the body and spirit in ways you can - exercise, healthy food, practice whatever spiritual beliefs you adhere to. And pamper yourself. Do things that make you feel good, a hot bath, at home mani/pedi, baking, good book, movies. It is tough but it does get better, trust me. I know you will get there!
|Tips? on Apr 03, 2016 @ 10:41 pm|
Relax. I've seen your blog and youtube. You are smart,a good friend to the guy in your videos,you are in a relationship, you are young, you write good reviews that we enjoy etc. There are times in all our lives when we just can't do something due to illness, boredom, finances etc. You have to realize that each day is a new one and wake up demanding of yourself that you are going to have a good day.What you can't do will keep, no problem. My advice is to look in the mirror and smile and you will see a young pretty girl. You have your significant other that loves you, and you have friends that don't care what you can't do; they love you the way you are.Please, enjoy your life.
|. on Apr 03, 2016 @ 11:43 pm|
Both ladies above mentioned excellent points and strategies. I hope you'll take their advice and try putting what you're comfortable doing into practice. Start small and build up your "toolbox" gradually. I call it a toolbox because these strategies are essential in building a safety net for when times get rough. I can't stress how important it is to learn to recognize your triggers and what to do to avoid them from exploding into something unmanageable. Have an arsenal of these above-mentioned tools ready for you to use at the drop of a hat in case you really need support, especially when your husband, family or friends aren't around during your particular time of need. Make a list if you have to and post it on your fridge to keep reminding yourself.
I know how difficult dealing with anxiety and depression can be. I suffer from severe chronic pain and there are days when it's really difficult to look on the bright side of life. It can get really lonely at times even though we're surrounded by lots of family and friends. What I've learned to realize is that our feelings are temporary and they do change. I used to live in terrible fear as to when the next bout of pain would hit me but now that I know my triggers and how to manage them, I can breathe easier and know it's going to be okay. I'm prepared, and right now, that's all that counts because it's what I can control. The one thing I keep repeating to myself is to enjoy this day and be thankful for all that it has given me. Rejoice the days where you notice yourself feeling amazing and live in that moment. It really is a day by day journey. I don't want to call it a struggle. Struggles beat us down, whereas journeys are passageways through life. Choose to live, learn and grow from this.
What I can add is to remember to treat yourself kindly. You need to be your own best friend. Speak to yourself with encouragement and compassion. Remind yourself of all the good things you do in this world. I also think forgiveness is an important step in moving forward. Forgiving others and ourselves for any wrongdoings or simply for not being able to be there for others is sometimes crucial in being able to move forward. Ask yourself if there's anything you need to let go of. Release your mind of that burden if it's weighing upon you.
Positive affirmations and vision boards can help give your mind a new direction. I know I've mentioned this in the past already, but it does help. Since vision boards are visual, it can help our wandering minds refocus, especially when we allow the "negative ants" to ruin our picnic. Whenever I have negative thoughts I picture them as ants that I shoo away Just like ants, negative thoughts can come scurrying in in droves. Weird analogy, but it helps! LOL!
So, let us know, if you'd like... What have you done today/this week that makes you special to others and to yourself? How did it make you feel afterwards? Personally, I can say that your sense of humor helped me this week after reading your blog. I felt less stressed after a strenuous day and I appreciate the time you took writing that post for us. Thank you!
I hope you keep us posted on what has worked for you. BTW...Have you started the geocaching yet? That should be a fun adventure! I look forward to reading up on how it went. :)
|. on Apr 04, 2016 @ 05:46 am|
Lorna, I know exactly how you feel. As you know, I've been really sick and off work since August 2014 with multiple bowel issues and suffer from severe chronic pain. My daily meds rival those of a cancer patient. On top of that I'm prescribed about 10 different vitamins and minerals plus a daily probiotic and now a daily dose of the stuff you have to drink for a colonoscopy prep (which is disgusting). I can't eat or drink many foods so I'm stuck on a very bland, minimal item diet. I mostly eat crackers, toast, plain buns, prepared drinks that give me nutrients, ginger ale for the constant nausea. I often cannot even get out of bed and have trouble sleeping either due to pain or from sleeping an entire day away and being up all night - like right now. I'm on heavy narcotics for the pain, which has just started to become bearable within the last month due to constant medication changes and doses. I've waited two years to FINALLY see the right specialist and I had the appt this past Friday, one day before my birthday. It's not good news. I am not a candidate for surgery anymore (my case is way too complicated severe, now affecting several organs. The surgeon I saw is one of the top experts in his field, and because I live in a big city I was lucky to see him. After two years of being told I need surgery and getting my hopes up that I would have it and get better, I can't tell you how disappointed and hopeless I feel knowing that I'm not able to have surgery. If I did, it would make my illness much, much worse. The scar tissue would increase the damage to the scar tissue I already have from several abdominal surgeries. So basically after hearing this bad news, and after having a huge cry, I need to learn to accept that I'm not going to get better, that with time I will only get worse and when it's at the worst point, at that time (who knows how long, 1 year, 5 years, 10???), when I finally get to that point, I will then have surgery to remove the diseased parts and have to wear a colostomy bag for the rest of my life. I just turned 39 two days ago. Just knowing that if I had been seen earlier I would have been able to be "fixed" makes me want to scream and cry at our health care wait times. And I was an "urgent" referral. I guess you need to be dying before urgent means urgent.
These illnesses have robbed me of my life. I have no quality of life anymore. All of me feels like a hot mess. There are so many things that I can't do.
Unfortunately I have no answers for you. I, myself, am feeling quite hopeless and depressed. Add all this to my PTSD and I feel quite like there's no point in being here. I am thankful to have an amazing therapist with extensive expertise in PTSD though. So even though it's really hard right now to accept my future, at least I can know I have this support in one area of my life.
There's no part of my life that hasn't been affected - my marriage, work, children, health, mental health, etc.
All I can offer is a listening ear and to let you know you're not alone. I would say it's very normal to feel the way you (and i) do. Anxiety and depression are big sh*theads! It's hard to remain positive when your whole life is affected. I definitely feel for you and I hope with all my heart that you are able to feel better, and soon. You're an awesome young lady and you deserve to be happy. You're funny and smart and kind and it sounds like you have an awesome, supportive husband. We need to find just one little positive thing each day. One little glimmer of hope. Make sure we keep laughing and have support in our lives. It's really hard sometimes but we need to be compassionate towards ourselves. Keep doing what you can and learn to be kind to yourself!!!
|@prettyrainbow on Apr 04, 2016 @ 05:49 am|
I just have to tell you again that you're such a positive person and it's a joy to see your positive outlook. You give some great advice and I know Lorna (and others) will appreciate it!