on Nov 30, 2011 @ 06:35 pm

So I know there are a ton of Mommies on this site and thought we could start a forum of what you find the best form of discipline to be?? I know I can't be alone when I say it can get SO frustrating when you think you have tried everything out there and your kids STILL refuse to listen or just laugh at you!


16 Replies

Take away something beloved on Nov 30, 2011 @ 06:53 pm

My son is almost 4 and he's been learning since he was about 1 or so what Mommy and Daddy like and don't like. In the beginning phase we were patient and once we felt he understood what we approved of, we would have consequences for bad behaviour.

Depending on the gravity of the "crime" we would take away snacks, favourite toys, games, and so forth. It really seems to hit home with him when he loses an opportunity to watch Thomas the Tank engine because he didn't follow the rules. And the effectiveness of this approach comes with following through, if we say we'll take something away and we don't, then he'll just push the limits. So far it seems to be working and it helps to also reward good behaviour, some good positive reinforcements never hurt.

Thanks on Nov 30, 2011 @ 07:04 pm

Thanks for your input!!! I guess my daughter must be worse because I am constantly taking things away from her and it doesn't phase her because she just goes and finds something else to play with (ugh! lol). I AM consistent with following through, but its like a losing battle at all times! At times you say things like "remember Santa is watching now to see if you are good or naughty.." but we all know, kids will always get Xmas gifts! lol

Awww on Nov 30, 2011 @ 08:30 pm

It is tough work being a parent, it's definitely a 24/7, for life type job. I am not sure what else to suggest but just keep taking things away, maybe her most favourite things. I would also try talking to her to maybe try and make her understand, being as honest as possible. I've started doing that with my son because I know he's starting to grasp certain concepts.
Like when he tries to avoid bed time, I explain and use examples of times when he went to bed too late and was so tired the next day. I know when I was young I thought my parents were obligated to do everything and felt like it was just their jobs, but I'm trying to show my son the difficulties, to try and get some mommy sympathy.

Also, here's a website that has a discipline discussion board and I haven't gone through the discussions but hopefully there will be some suggestions here:

Hard Work on Nov 30, 2011 @ 09:00 pm

I am a mom of 3 kids. Jayson 2, Justin 10, and Jordan 12. I will start by saying every child is different. On top of being a mom I am also a Child and Youth Worker.

My best advice is keep the consequence consistent with the behaviour. For example, If she doesnt go to bed on time, the next night she can go to bed early. Positive reinforcement works great too. Whe you she is behaving and following rules shower her with praise and compliments. If you take something away from her and she goes to find something else, maybe change the consequence to losing that certain toy for a week. That way she may then care. Great that you are consistent though. I find over time you will learn what works for your child and what doesnt.
My 12 year old responds well to consequences and is very open with me. We can talk about his behaviours and work together to make it better. My 10 year old is quiet and not very open at all. He hates being grounded and losing video games. My 2 year is absolutely crazy hyper and very mouthy. I dont really know what to do about him though. We kind of use the excuse, "hes sill a baby". Hes not though, and I worry hes becoming spoiled. Any advice for this age would be greatly appreciated.
Good luck. Being a mom is a journey and as long as yor dedicated and involved you will do great as a parent!

honey I wrecked the kids on Nov 30, 2011 @ 10:03 pm

Have you read the book honey, I wrecked the kids - by alyson schafer?

She talks about giving kids choices/options - and setting out the consequences. One of the biggest things is logical consequences (they don't listen to you, so you take away a toy - it's not logical in their mind ; but, they throw the car, you tell them they can choose to not throw it, or they can choose to throw it - but if they throw it, the cars will be taken away = logical consequence with their own choice)

I started following it right away, and was amazed at the difference. The biggest thing is to change how YOU react to the situation. It is hard, and I often find myself slipping - but on the days I follow her method, I am amazed at the lack of yelling/fighting in our household

Ali de Bold
GREAT topic! on Dec 01, 2011 @ 08:10 pm

Moms out there please share as much advice as possible. I will need this one day soon! My baby is too small for me to chip in right now but I know I'll need it later!

Mom of 3 Kids, Still learning one day at a time on Dec 01, 2011 @ 09:03 pm

i am mom of 3 young ones, 7 , 2 and 1. I think as early as 10 months, he knows he is the boss. I meant...he throw the spoon on the ground, I pick it up. I'm laid back on some, and strict on other stuff.

Listening skills: speak softly, and they will get interested. Yell, and they will ignore you.

Kneel down, sit down, look at them in the eye. Instead of saying no, try shaking your head, and ask the kids nicely to pick it up. This does not work for Karlina, my princess two year old, but my youngest seems to follow my lead.
Each child is unique too, so its a work in progress. What works for the eldest, does not work for the youngest or vice versa.

Eating: if they are picky eaters, just let them be. If they get hungry enough, they will eat whatever you give them, including brocolli.

Fighting over a toy: inform them that if they fight over a toy, the toy goes by by. And follow up. Give the toy time out. 2 minutes. Then ask them if they want to play with toy again and share.

Its a work in progress but any work is!

Work out instead of time out on Dec 01, 2011 @ 09:10 pm

my 7 year old son has a habit of ignoring my rules, for example: "ask mommy before going to neighbors house for play" . He will disappear from the frontyard, and I will be looking for him all over.

one day, i was so frustrated that he was gone out of my sight, so I have to search for him in the neighbors backyard. He knows exactly that mom was not impress and he said he is going to his room for his time out.

I decided to let him work out, instead of time out.

I let him run around the court 10 times, as I was sitting by my front steps enjoying a cup of coffee. He was sweating out, and begging me if he could stop. I told him to complete 10 laps and we call it even. Since then, he never strayed.


Ali de Bold
Hahahaha! on Dec 01, 2011 @ 09:43 pm

Angelinarosaries, that is hilarious! I can just picture it.

AMAZING IDEAS!! on Dec 03, 2011 @ 11:06 pm

Thank you EVER SO MUCH to all you ladies for all your input...there are some excellent ideas here and advice that I will definitely try from now on! I will keep you posted on what seems to work! hehe

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