Being a Young Mother

on Nov 01, 2015 @ 11:26 pm

Hey there to whom ever reads this ! So I never really get to talk about this not many of my friends understand my life. I became a mom at 18 I am currently 19. It is so hard ! I mean yess being a mom can be hard at any age but to see all my friends go out and live their youth whie I stay home is depressing ! I Love my baby boy More then anything and I wouldn't trade him for the world. The father is gone and I have no clue where he is (Which is kinda a good thing ! He was a little abusive) But im alone in this !! I just wish I had someone who was just listen to my problems without trying to compete and not a therapist I have to pay for just a friend who just listens, you know what I mean ?

The father was a drug addict who only cared for him self ! I hate him so much its crazy ! I never knew I was capable of so much hate! Like if another guy even so much as looked at me I was in trouble ! He would shove me, grab me and pull me, pin me on the wall or ground and get right in my face and yell, pull my hair and call me names im not even sure I can say on here! Im out now living with family but when I think about it I just wanna curl up and cry! I just pray no one has to go through what I went through !

Now I am a young girl trying to learn the ropes of life earlier then expected and as fast as possible so I can be the best mother to my son but sometimes I get so scared that im not doing good enough like hes going to grow up hating me. Going to school, getting my license, supporting him, caring for him everyday! Don't get me wrong it is totally worth it ! Just something I am not used to.

Is there anyone here who is, was, or knows someone who is a young or single mother? Who went through abuse ?

Sorry I wanted to let that out ....


4 Replies

Hang in there on Nov 02, 2015 @ 12:40 am

I'm in the opposite situation, I wait to have my babies, but now I'm turning 30 and still waiting! So both ends of the scale are tough. That being said I really, really feel for you.

I've never experienced spousal abuse, but experienced abuse by a family member when I was a child and I know how much something like that can ruin your confidence and hurt your standard of living.

You don't have to apologise for anything! My advice would be to try and join a local mother's group so you can have people to support you and help you through this.

The good thing about having your kids young is that when they grow up, you get your life back at a relatively young age! Hang in there and never forget, that you are not a bad mother and you are doing your best <3

Hi on Nov 02, 2015 @ 12:27 pm

I've never experienced spousal abuse, but there are lots of resources out there that are free to help you sort through your feelings on that. Try talking to your local public health nurse, I'm sure she'll have tons of resources for you both as an abuse victim and a single mother.
I'm glad youve got your family to help you. Being a mom is tough but a worthy job. You have the chance to give your boy the manners, morals and skills it takes to be a great and caring man, something his dad was not. That is the greatest thing you can do for your boy - teach him how to be a compassionate and honorable man. Try looking for local moms groups I the community and check out Facebook. The website and apps for What To Expect are filled with wonderful women on them any forums there. I've received tons of support, encouragement and advice there.
My best friend was in a similar situation to you at 18. She found it tough. But found help through her mom, grandma and both old and new friends. Once she began asking for help and building a support circle, things got easier.
Remember to take a few moments a day for yourself and if you can, get your mom to watch baby every so often. Above all, enjoy your boy. Children are such a blessing if we take the time to slow down with them. They truly do grow so fast.
Being a single mother is tough but I believe everything happens for a reason and we are sometimes give a very full plate, but never more than we can ultimately deal with. Reach out to both new and old friends, aunts, your mom, grandmothers and ask for help when you need it. You are doing a great job! I wish you the best!

Thank you on Nov 02, 2015 @ 03:39 pm

Thank you all for the support it means a lot to me and I am looking into a local young mothers group my family also suggested I do that so I am going to give it a try thankyou

Good luck on Nov 02, 2015 @ 03:44 pm

I don't have children, so I don't have any advice...but I think a group is a great idea! You may even find someone you really enjoy hanging out with in the same boat as you. You could arrange play dates together, and some time alone while one watches the other's child.
I wish you luck, doll. We are all always here with an ear if you ever just want to talk.

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