5 Taboo Topics

Ali de Bold
on Aug 25, 2009 @ 07:26 pm

Spurred by a thoughtful question from relatives, I have gone on a wee rant:

1. You're so old, why aren't you pregnant yet?
Thank you to the 3 relatives who said this to me this week alone. I realize in your world view I should have had 10 children by now (having started at 19, naturally) but I don't share your view that kids are the *only* calling for women or that you have to be younger than 25 before you start.

2. Well?? Have you met anyone yet?

For my single ladies (and men) everywhere. This question is balls and shouldn't be asked. It, like point #1 suggests that the ultimate fulfillment for a person is a romantic relationship and that view should be discouraged.

3. Any plans for marriage?
Any plans for liposuction? Not everyone wants to get married, and if they do, this is salt in the wound, no?

4. Does my butt look fat?
Actually, yes! But we should all monitor what we say and think about our bodies - especially around young women/girls who don't need one more person influencing them to feel badly about themselves.

5. We're trying at the moment (giggle!)
Please, I don't want to picture you two naked.

What other topics do you vote should be taboo?

14 Replies

i know how u feel on Aug 26, 2009 @ 09:08 am

Miss chickie Number # 1 is one topic I think is really nobody's business. I've been married for a few years and people are constantly asking me when I going to have kids. I do want children but not at the moment. I think it's a very personal matter.

# 5 that's soo true!!!

Another taboo topic....how much money to you make?? My husband and parents knows but that's pretty much it. This is one area I don't discuss with my friends.

Ali de Bold
good one! on Aug 26, 2009 @ 09:12 am

How much money you make is definitely not something you should feel obliged to report to anyone besides the Tax Man.

Alex and I are just past the 4 year mark and I find #1 happens more and more now.

You should eat more.. on Aug 26, 2009 @ 10:28 am

Because I'm tiny and working my butt off to become a fitness competitor I constantly have women telling me to eat more.

It goes both ways. Don't tell someone to eat less or eat more. Let them do them.

Ali de Bold
Oooooh! on Aug 26, 2009 @ 10:38 am

I hate that one too so much, Robynb!

so true!!! on Aug 26, 2009 @ 11:02 am

#3 is the one I get a lot of and I hate that!! I recently had a "friend" tell me that if I plan on getting married, waiting a bit to enjoy the 'single' unencumbered married life before having children, I better hop to it and find myself a husband because I'm not getting any younger...ouch!! Needless to say I don't talk to that "friend" quite as much. The other day he asked me why I've shut him off, I told him I didn't, but I've no time for him as I'm husband huting ;-) hehe

The "How much money do you make" is another one I come across often.

Another one someone asked me recently was "How much do you weigh" ...uhh excuse you??? I later realized he was being funny trying to get me riled up (which he succeeded in doing) but still...!!

And #5 just makes me laugh... whenever I hear that my inside voice says "do you not know the process...??"


make-up junkie
All 5 inappropriate and I have some more to add! on Aug 26, 2009 @ 02:46 pm

When I was
pregnant and before my husband and I got married older women would come
up to me when I was working at MAC and ask if I was going to raise the
baby on my own because they didn't see a ring on my finger! Now that's
"BALLS" as Ali would say haha.

Another one I used to get when I was prego and because I look young was "Are you still in high school?"!!!

know how it's inappropriate to ask a woman her age? Well, it seems if
you look young that goes out the window. I hate when people ask me how
old I am. Would you ask someone that looked older their age??? I just
don't care and actually get a good laugh at their reaction when I tell
them my age and that I'm married with a 3 yr old! haha

One that I think people don't really find intrusive is "How much did you buy your home for?" or "How much do you make?"

Alright that's enough of me ranting! :)

work and children on Aug 27, 2009 @ 12:00 am

Great list already. I have a few to add myself:

- Why are you still in school? Shouldn't you be working? (What they are really saying is: You are too old to be in school. Go out and get a real job. *hint hint*)

- When I was unemployed looking for work, I get a lot of people asking me if I've found a job, why I haven't found a job with all my degrees...? Then the same people would proceed to giving me job hunting advice, the same advice every tom, dick, and harry I meet were giving me, advice I've already tried with absolutely no success. To top things off, these are also the same people who hasn't changed their jobs in over 10 years.

- People ask me how I am doing with my baby. I tell them the mundane things like what we do with ourselves, what I feed the baby, etc. Then, they'd laugh at me and say, "Oh honey, wait until you have your second. You wouldn't be doing _that_ when you have 2 kids." Ummm...excuse me? The last I check, I only have one, so why shouldn't I dote on my only child like he is an only child?? And who said I'm going to have a second?!?! Honestly, this is #1 on my list right now. If I hear one more person telling me I wouldn't do this/that if I have 2 kids, I'll slap him/her.

Food and School on Aug 27, 2009 @ 10:06 am

Your 5 taboos had me actually laughing out loud at work Ali!

I SO agree with you robynb! I am naturally tiny and I HATE it when people point it out! I try not to complain about it because I feel that I might get punched in the face one day lol but really, how is it ok to make small people feel bad for being small? I have been accused of not eating and of having an eating disorder and I really resent that because I don't look sickly! Its not fair to call people out for being small because our society is so disgustingly obsessed with weight.

Also bubblybunny you reminded me of another one I hate ... when people ask what your major is ... I reply "geography" and they say "what are you going to do with that?" Holy discouraging! Not to mention I am also in Education so I plan to become a teacher to which people will say, "smart move, you'll get summers off" OMG that is NOT why I am becoming a teacher!!! People going into teaching for those reasons are why we have so many horrid teachers in the world.

Ok angry rant over lol


Ali de Bold
Haha! on Aug 27, 2009 @ 11:21 am

Becky - people who ask you how much money you make, just say, "No, you first! tee hee!"

Joy - Awwww! I used to get people thinking I was young. Not any more! I did get hit on recently by a boy child (15?) who was like , "Yo wassup, lady? How old you are, babygirl?" I said, "Child, I am your mother's age."

BubblyBunny - I can only imagine how annoying it must be to get childcare advice from others since I do it to my sister all the time. Am so wise having none myself. ;) She's gracious about it, thankfully! But I don't like hearing horror stories about how hard it is. Not exactly inspiring us to rush out and appease our relatives.

Curlysue10 - Haha! I've probably said that to most of my teacher friends. I think sometimes you're stumped for something clever to say and the summer remark is the most obvious.

Love these lists - keep 'em coming!

make-up junkie
people always have something to say haha on Aug 27, 2009 @ 11:22 am

bubblybunny- I find when it comes to kids people always have something to say even when it's not warranted. You're totally right - your son is your only child right now so why wouldn't you give him that attention he deserves??

curlysue - i know in my culture (I'm filipino) if you're too skinny it means you're not eating enough and then everyone tries to force feed you haha. And if you're over-weight they tell you to stop eating but then ask you right after if you want to eat! you just can't win!

when I do hair/makeup I always ask what major they are in and what they are going to do after school to make conversation. opps! i would never imply that they wouldn't be able to do anything with it though - that's just wrong. but some majors sound so complicated and ones I've never heard of so I always ask what they are going to do after so I can get an idea of what work they will be doing. but I'll admit - if you just said "geography" to me I would have probably asked what you'll be doing with it. But since you said you're also majoring Education then that makes sense! :)

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