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Engagement rings - Does the price matter?


meguinn
on Jun 21, 2010 @ 11:12 am

My boyfriend brought me to a jewlery store the other day to look at engagement rings to see which style I like!! I'm getting soo excited, I have no idea when he's thinking of proposing, but obviously it's on his mind! :D

I know he wants to spend between $1000 and $1500, and I'm quite happy with that!

But I also know people (i.e. my parents) who only spent a couple hundred, which I'm not sure I'd be too happy with?

What is your opinion on how much should be spent on an engagement ring? Does it matter? And if so, what is your ideal price?

Yay!
 

26 Replies


beachbabe
Mine is fake. And I love it. on Sep 22, 2011 @ 04:25 pm

My husband and I dated for a total of about 15 months before we got engaged. I lived in Winnipeg and he lived in Edmonton. After about 4 months, that's when we had a serious conversation about plans to get married (we knew from the beginning of our relationship we would). He then took a piece of string that was in the car and tied it around my finger. He said some day he'd give me a real ring. A few minutes later, he decided we should go pick out a ring for me to wear and this would be my promise ring. We picked one out together. It was only worth $70.00 but to this day it's the most important thing that I own. He later proposed with that ring and we bought a matching band. We're both young, 21 and 22 when we got married and still university students (although he's working in a busines now). For maybe a 5th anniversary, I'll get something "nicer".

I'm saying that I wouldn't have cared if he gave me a ring from a $1 gumball machine. I also wouldn't have cared if he spent 3 months salary on a ring, which at that time would have been almost $9000 (to me, that is just INSANE money to spend on a ring. I'd MUCH rather put it towards a mortgage). If it's the right man, you know he loves you and a life with him should have no price tag.

Men are also very practical. It's quite possible he'd rather save that money to help pay for the wedding, honeymoon, mortgage, or something along those lines. Plus, no matter how much he spent, he still put thought into picking a style he thinks you'll love. Most guys I know have confessed it'd crush them if they proposed after weeks or even months of picking the perfect ring (no matter the cost) and she says no because she doesn't like the ring or doesn't think he spent enough.

About him saying it felt "forced"... I think what he's trying to say is that he'd rather be the one to pick out the more expensive ring he plans to get you. It's his right of passage to pick a ring and propose just like it's ours to feel wooed and loved as a result. It's a big deal to a man to pick out the ring, just like it is for us to get it. What I would do is say to him, "I'm sorry I made you feel I was forcing the decision of the ring on you. I'm sure you'd rather be the one to pick what you give me. Is that true?"

Mine is a cubic zirconia, and actually no one can tell it's even fake lol I've had "diamond connoisseurs" estimate that mine is worth ALOT of money. And it doesn't look fake at all.

It's great he wants to get you a nicer ring down the road. But let him choose when he does it and what it looks like. Until then, be thankful you have a man who loves you and wants to spend his life with you and wants to get plans in motion even if he can't afford an elaborate ring at this very moment. It's about your life together :)
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becky
agree with everything on Sep 22, 2011 @ 04:58 pm

I agree with everything beachbabe said, except.... I have a big except.

I agree love and relationship doesn't have a price tag. But why did this guy brag to you about how he's getting you the $7000 tiffany's? Why hold you off with a temporary ring? Why even brag about something like money, how much he has in his bank, and how much he's going to spend on your ring? I don't think it's the price of the ring that cheapens the relationship, rather the behaviour. Why brag? Just not classy in my books. Especially if as anon says he has talked big in the past only to have it fall through, that's just really lame.

I think its much classier and shows better character if the guy gets the ring he can comfortably afford without the big talks behind it. Whether its cheap or expensive is besides the point.

@anon if people want to see the ring, just tell them that we're still in the middle of picking it out. I'll show you as soon as I have it.

The problem isn't that it's fake or real. But that he bragged about the big expensive ring, then gave you fake one temporarily and called you materialistic. Maybe I'm just too picky, but that would rub me the wrong way!

Beachbabe what your husband did was very classy and sweet!! He gave you the best he could comfortably afford. Who gives a fig if its cz or real? Is it going to feel any different when you wear it? Are you going to love him in proportion to the carats? lol... It's heartfelt, and that's what matters. :-)

I don't even know how much my wedding band cost. My husband asked me what sort of ring I wanted and I said I want something I can wear all the time, 'cuz I never wanna take it off. So he gave me a simple, slim and in my eyes beautiful elegant channel setting band ..and I love it. I couldn't have picked something better for myself if I tried. I don't know how much it cost and I can't even imagine asking him. It's not the price of the ring that gives the value. The fact that our men put their minds, and hearts and effort into getting it. They did something completely and only for us. That's what makes the value. On that note, if my husband got me a showy flashy big diamond 'cuz he wants to show off to others - that's not sweet at all!! And I don't want that ring!! I don't want a ring he bought for someone else. I'd rather have a simple one he bought only for me.

I know a few big talkers, and they really truly piss me off. I feel like telling them to shut their mouths and keep their dignity. Instead of bragging and losing what little they have left.
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ali-de-bold
Beachbabe on Sep 22, 2011 @ 10:28 pm

I just have to say that I absolutely love what you wrote. So romantic! It sounds like you have a great relationship and your heart is completely in the right place. You are right about what is most important and with an attitude like that you two will have a strong relationship.
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beachbabe
Oh, why thank you! on Sep 23, 2011 @ 05:07 pm

@Ali - That's very nice of you! :) We are very happy.
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michele-lewis
beauty is in the eye of the beholder. on Oct 01, 2011 @ 10:39 am


i've never been engagement ring shopping, nor can i offer any advice from particularly personal experience; however,

my parents have been going to the same jeweler for as long as i can remember.
the jeweler there ALWAYS tells my dad that you shouldn't go by the size, cost or karats of a diamond. if it looks nice to you, then none of that stuff matters.

just becase a ring it $5,000, doesn't make it any nicer/better looking than a ring that only costs $500. You should disucss something like that with your fiancee and decide what you like the best, and if it's his price range, etc.

good luck & congratulations. (: x
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tashacat
From the heart... on Oct 01, 2011 @ 06:07 pm

You just know when the guy has spent time, thought and money on the ring. It could be at any price point, but I have to agree with previous comments that this is a very big piece of jewelry. It's only a symbol, but it is the most visible symbol you will ever receive, and with it, you are promising your heart to someone forever. I would think that a guy would spend as much as he could to afford something that you both would be proud of 10 years from now.

There are exceptions and I love Beachbabe's story.

In the end though, I am so glad that my guy got me a ring that was sentimental but at the top end of what we could afford. I have barely taken of my finger for the better part of 2 decades. I clean with it, garden with it, and whenever I get jewelery, I have a rule; I don't want it to be worth more than that ring. Even when I bought myself a custom made 'right hand ring', it had to come second to my engagement ring. (And this works really well since we never did buy a wedding band - I married using that same ring).

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