on Dec 15, 2011 @ 04:15 pm|
my bf and I were together for 7 years and he broke up with me about 10 months ago. we have had other break ups before (a couple) and have gotten back together after like a month or so. The previous break ups all happened after our friend (his very close friend) committed suicide about a year and a half ago and my bf has not really dealt with it yet.
we kept in touch while broken up even when i went overseas to visit my dad for 5 months we sent each other fb msgs including bday wishes and even flirted a bit like when we first started going out. I called him twice when i was away. The 1st time was very casual and comfortable and the 2nd time i brought up getting back together and how i could see some of my stuff that bugged him. he basically said to me that we have given this thing enough chances and that its not fair for me to come back after 4-5 months and getting him all confused again. I told him that the chances we gave each other were too soon cuz we never had the chance to reflect back and that i just want to him to think about it. at the end of the convo (i think as a last resort) he said he is dating someone. I acted completely cool with it and said i'm sure she's nice but she'll never be what i was to you, just like no guy will ever be what you were to me. i also told him that while being away i met someone (a friend) who had all the stuff i always wanted him to have (be able to argue about everything! yeah i know! but i wanna be a lawyer so...) but it was not attractive to me anymore and made me realize what i had was in fact what i wanted. After our convo he went to fb and changed his relationship status to "in a relationship" which is so weird that all of a sudden you're doing this! So I have been back home for about 3 months now. We keep in casual contact like every week or so we text each other to see how the other is doing but i never brought up getting back together again. I have seen him about 7-8 times now, most of it was his idea.Once i gave him a whole bunch of stuff i had brought back for him to let him know i was thinking about him. He loved all of it. I have seen him with friends and also alone. He always seems to want to make the night longer. It starts with meeting up and leads to dinner and then coffee... this is usually when we're with friends. He still pays for my food, we share food and sit next to eachother. I've been told that to other people it looks the same as it always did, like we're still dating! When we're alone he seems very comfortable like usual, he has played with my hair commenting on the fact that i had straightened it (i have naturally curly hair), he has smacked me on my ass or bit my ass as a joke, he has ticked me, sat on top of me and grabbed my boobs as a joke while i'm lying on his bed (and i could tell he was excited if u know what i mean!!), and now last week when i took him some coffee while he was at work, we were saying goodbye and he kissed me on the lips, very quick, more like a peck like he usually does when he says goodbye. I thought it was a reflex and i looked to see if he'll get nervous or apologize but he just smiled, held my hand for a sec and walked off. A couple of days later he texted me again and we met up for coffee, he was very casual, commented on my boobs and bra as a joke but then something happened. He walked off to take a phone call and i had his ipod. I clicked on his mail and found a couple of emails from a girl with a picture of her with the words "Love you, i'm sorry :(" on the pic. One email has the colored picture and one has a black and while pic, same pic, same words. and there was one email to her with no text, just the subject "love you"!!! Do you think he is in love with this new person now? she is not here, she is long distance but i have seen him text people when we're out with friends. What do you think i should do??? I really want him back. it was 7 years :(( and i love him sooooooo much.
Also you should know that i am 28 and he is 26. He hasn't found himself yet, doesn't know what he wants to do with his life which is one of the reasons he gave me for breaking up. He doesn't wanna hold me back (bullshit!!!). This guy is so bad at talking and communicating so i'm afraid if i say anything to him about wanting to be back again he'll just say no and that'll push him back 20 steps. he has also commented on fb after seeing me one night that being in love is so hard and you shouldn't fall in love cuz it fucks u over!! my friends think he needs to play the field before coming back cuz he didn't really date before dating me when he was 18. i'm also really close with his family especially his sister.
anyways... please tell me what u think i should do... i really need to get him back...
|:( on May 07, 2012 @ 08:12 am|
It sounds like he's playing you and playing with your feelings. That's not love. That just means he's having trouble letting go. Not that he doesn't want to let go, just that he's in the habit of having you make yourself available to him.
It's not fair, girly! And you WILL meet someone else.
Your quote "she'll never be what i was to you, just like no guy will ever be what you were to me" isn't true either.
He will meet someone he's more compatible with. But so will you!
Stay strong! Nobody is going to want someone who clearly isn't over their ex boyfriend either. So try and move on and open yourself to something new! You'll find someone great :)
|Filet Mignon on Aug 04, 2012 @ 11:00 am|
You need to try casually dating a few other men. Maybe you will develope feelings for someone else and then you can put this guy in the past. He can't seem to let go of a sure thing, that being you in case the other girl does not work out. It soulds like you are his constant back up plan. You deserve better than this and 28 is still young. Look at it like those 7 years together was a time for you to figure out what you like and did not like in a men. He was your appetizer now go find the main course. (filet mignon)
I wish you the best of luck and there is someone better for you out there!
|ex and why they are ex's on Aug 15, 2012 @ 01:05 am|
In life we fall into the trap of being with someone and getting back together with someone because we are afraid of change and the unknown.
Trust me on this one. There is someone out there for you and this man is not the one.
Start dating, YOU deserve to be loved for you all of you the good and the bad, a man who accepts you one hundred percent for who you are in your strengths and weaknesses.
|Two ways. . . on Oct 30, 2012 @ 01:14 pm|
Make him realize that you are the girl for him. He might just be confused with the relationship. There are chances that he is an unstable person when it comes to taking decisions. Well, for now, he knows that you still like him. Maybe he has taken you for granted. Show him that you can go without him for a month or two. Relationships usually vaporize your social life. Meet old friends. Post the fun you had to your fb wall! Put up pics he liked as your display photos! You can do this if you really want him back.
I'd say that you will find a much much much better guy. More stable, loving, caring and someone who is sure about you.
but. . .If you are ready to accept your ex with all his imperfections, then try your luck ! :)
|Can this relationship work an can I get her back or should I move on ?? on Nov 27, 2012 @ 02:26 am|
Hey I'm 23 years old male an I was with a women she is 27 years old an has 2 kids a little girl that is 5 years old an a little boy that is 6 years old , . I met her at a night club she is a waitress so I would go all the time an finally started talking to her we started going out really pretty girl with a nice body . We started dating a finally we got together I was a little jealous because I know she has to deal with guys an she would txt guys all the time an we started having problems because of that , I was with her for almost one year but we would always be together all the time there was no day that she wouldn't come over my house or I wouldn't go over her house I met her kids an her family an everything seem to go well .. We would go out with her kids all the time an I started faking in love with the kids an with her she also has a really good job in the day time at a hospital an makes good money . At the time I lost my job an she would pay for almost everything I felt a little insecure because u would provide all the time but she didn't mind , but the little money I will get I will buy her flowers all the time an do really nice things for her an the kids I treat her like a princess an treated her kids so good an she would even tell me that I was so great to her an her kids .. But then she started getting to controlling .. We would talk all the time she would call me before she when into work an when she got out a on her lunch an then time past an she wouldn't call me at all I will be the one calling her all the time an she wouldn't answer or tell me she didn't take a lunch I found out she tarted going to lunch with guy friends behind my back so we got into a huge fight because of that .so the problems got bigger she would start screaming at me an treating me bad an we would fight a lot all the time specially in the weekends . I would never go out just stay at home waiting for her to come out of work from her night job an she would come sleep over .. Then we started more serious with our relationship an I propose to her but she wouldn't wear the ring in the finger that it was suppose to go on . An I told her why is she doing that an she said because it was to loose supposedly . So I drop it I don't really said anything anymore . An she has her own place with her kids so started moving in an I started working again so I was starting by paying the rent .. An we were so serious that we were living together already the kids love me so much . An she would always complain that she wanted to go it with friends so I started letting her even dough I didn't like it .. I was really jealous . But then when I wanted to go out she wouldn't like it at all an age would get mad.so one day I seem a message from her manager from the night club texting her if he can take her out to eat ?? An if she can send him a naked pic ? So I seem that message an I told her what the hell was this an she got really scared an red that she didn't know that maybe he got confused An txt the wrong waitress so we got into a huge fight an we talk bout it an she said she was going to talk to him an tell him not to txt her stuff like that that she has a boyfriend .. So with time I drop it but of course I couldn't really trust her a lot . So the fights kept going maybe like ones a week for little things she would always get mad all the time an be angry for no reasons .. An then maybe like 2 months later after that incident I when out an had a couple drinks by myself an when I came home she was texting someone but she deleted the messages but then someone reply back an it was the same guy her manager an he txt do are u coming to work my love ?? This weekend I can't wait to see u so I lost it I got so mad an told her what was this so uncalled him an told him what what his problem that she has a boyfriend why is he texting her like that an he apologize an said that my ex didn't told her she had a bf just that she had 2 kids . So I lost it an broke her phone on the sink an she started hitting me in my face so I hold her an told her to stop an she started kicking me so I slap her a few times I know I was wrong I should of just walk away completely but I didn't so she got so scared an told me to leave the house so I got all my stuff an I left . The next day age called me that why did I do that that it wasn't like that . She would still call me like a week later I started calling her an she would ignore my calls an she would tell me me she was done for good that she wants nothing to do with me at all . So I begg her so much like crazy I would show up her house an she would kick me out she told me to go get help so I did I enrolled into anger management programs maybe like 3 weeks ago an I been going a lot me an her been broken up for already a month an one week an finally after trying I got the the point an left he alone so this weekend on n thanksgiving she called me that she wanted to hang out so if it real happy an we did hang out everything was good we had a great time me her an the kids like before an in the night she came over an we hook up for the first time in over one month so the next day that es Friday we talk really good on the phone an she called me if we can go shopping so we when an I paid for everything an in the night we hook up again . An on say we hang out again an told her I haven't cash my check but we still hang out an she paid for the food when we when out but she gave me attitude so I told her thy I would pay her back the next day I paid her back an we still hang out agin on Sunday we when to go eat with the kids an to the mall but I didn't buy anything or paid for her stuff so I notice she was bother an she started giving me attitude so in the night time she had to do her laundry an I help her bit when I try getting close to her she told me to leave her alone that we are not together so I trip out what was she acting like this?? So I ask her an she said that she doesn't want to talk about it to just leave her alone we are not together at all an never will be . So when she drop me off at home I told her if she wanted to come in she said no that she is tired an she doesn't like me at all that she only used me for sex .. An I got real mad an came inside my house so then she called me a said sorry that she didn't mean that a all that she is still hurt of what happen an still not over that . So I reply but saying that is ok no problem an we click the phone . We been texting back an fourth now an things are getting worst again so I decided to tell her that I was down for good that I deserve better an don't need someone who treats me like this after trying so hard an showing her an her kids real love .. I told her she was really controlling an selfish person an then she try calling me an I don't answer at all an I told her I made my choice already that we should just move on already . An she said yes that it's the best thing for both of us . But then today she called me that she wanted to talk to me so when I had a chance I called her an she didn't answer so I txt her I taught u wanted to talk to me an she sauce never mind that she is by with the kids an I txt her why is she like that ? An she reply by saying she is not in love with me anymore an is not comfortable with me at all that she is not happy with me an never will to leave her alone so I txt her back by replying a bunch of things I didn't disrespect her at all but I did told her that she is almost 30 years old that she is going to loose me completely that I could make her an her kids happy I show her an her kids love .. An she just said to leave her alone what should I do this is so complicated I really do love this girl with all my heart ..
Anonymous has posted in the forum topic Bartholin Cyst
xjoxjoxjospehinex earned the badge: Beauty Guru