too much?

on Jun 21, 2014 @ 11:09 am

hi everyone,

so my boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years, we're both 19. through out our whole relationship I knew my boyfriend watches porn and jerks off but recently it's been getting farther and farther..

he bought himself two fleshlights (male masturbating toys) and has been using them. I take and send him pictures of me nude, with bikinis on, just pics of my ass and stufff like that for him to use with the toys when I'm not there. BUT he also saves pics of random asses and girls on his phone along with some pics that are of girls in bathing suits from twitter. I don't know the girl in the picture..

should I be concerned that his fantasizing is too much? should I talk to him about it? I feel like I'm not good enough for him anymore and that he would rather look at other girls body's than mine.

3 Replies

Gross on Aug 05, 2014 @ 09:43 pm

Um not ok. Porn is one thing but pictures of girls on twitter? I sure hope he doesn't know them. Of course you should talk to him. I feel like your sending him those pics just so he'll use them. Not a great idea. And once he has them, he can do whatever he wants to with them- especially when you break up. Be careful.

Touchy on Aug 18, 2014 @ 11:47 pm

This is honestly a touchy subject for guys. Yes they like sex and like to talk about it (you're boyfriend seems to be no exception) but they only see porn and nude pics of girls as just another way to get off. We as girls often see this as a sense of cheating. You have to take in that your boyfriend is at an age where he begins his peak of hormones (yes, guys actually do have more hormones than we do when it comes to things like sex). He's constantly thinking about sex and he can't really do anything about it. Biologically, his body is doing this to him.

Now onto a less biological part~

You should take in your relationship by thinking about this perspective: You've been in a relationship for three years, since you were about sixteen, correct? He has been committed to you since then and that is a lot for a teenage boy. He might want to know what being with another girl would be like. Now, don't doubt your relationship. He is still with you, which means that even if he wonders, he still cares about you more than anything. In a sense, what he is doing with the fleshlights is actually a sign of commitment and should encourage your trust in a sense.

Now with those twitter girls, has he tweeted them or messaged them? and if so, was it something you would consider bad to your relationship?

See I would keep a close eye on him and if he starts to communicate with them, then I would talk to him about it.

And never feel like you're not good enough for him because he looks at other girls. If anything feel good about yourself because you're more than good enough for him. Just the fact that you're seeking out advice about your relationship speaks wonders on how much of a good person you are, that any guy would be lucky to have.


umm on Aug 19, 2014 @ 10:03 am

When it starts making youu feel badly about yourself, that is when you draw the line.

I think with men, sex is sex. Whereas with women, its a more intimate matter. So maybe try talking to him about it. Try doing it in a way that wont cause him to go on the defensive either because that will not help at all.

It took me and my husband years before we got all that stuff straightened out. As long as hes willing to empathize and change his habits then you should be able to get over it

Its worth the effort if its a good relationship in every other way.
Sex is just... complicated sometimes

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