on Dec 12, 2014 @ 02:23 pm|
I'm curious to know people's experience with labour for their first born. Everyone, including my midwife, is trying to convince me that labour will be long and grueling and could last 2 or 3 days. And just because contractions start it doesn't mean anything. And that it's impossible for me to deliver before 40 weeks. But from what I've read online, some women can start having contractions and then about 5 hours later they have a baby. And some people have had babies at 37 weeks, even with their first baby. When I mention this it seems like my midwife just laughs and says this is really really rare for a first baby. So I'd just like to get other women's stories. Any car babies?
|No car on Dec 12, 2014 @ 03:32 pm|
My son started contracting around supper time, 6-ish maybe. The pains were pretty severe, but not having experienced it before was scarier than actually having them. By 7:30pm I was at the hospital getting an epidural. (I didn't do that every again, but that is another story.) My son was finally born at 1:52 am. So I was in labor for about 14 hours. It sucked right up until he was out.
I just want you to know, my next child started contracting at 7pm and was born at 7:48 pm. It happened that fast.
Every child born is different. I don't think there is any possible way to think yours would last 2-3 days just because some one else did. Your baby might pop out as fast as my second. The have their own schedule and come when they want.
I would get a new midwife, though I didn't use one; not sure what they are useful for when you have family and doctors. The fact that she is trying to convince you it will be long and terrible is distasteful for her profession. Seriously.
I wish you luck. Being a first-time mom kinda sucks because you worry so much you forget to enjoy it.
|thanks for sharing on Dec 12, 2014 @ 08:00 pm|
That's about what the midwife estimated, about 14 hours to a day possibly or a bit longer depending.
My doctor is a recent graduate which means he's not allowed to go to a hospital to deliver babies. Only the older doctors are on that grandfather clause, otherwise every new doctor isn't allowed in the hospital. So I would be stuck seeing an OB and possibly not even getting the same doctor during labour. With a midwife I'm pretty much guaranteed to only see her or the second midwife as backup who I've also been meeting with. So they're both aware of my health and disorders and other idiosyncrasies that a random OB delivering my baby wouldn't know. Plus I've gotten to know them and become comfortable with them, which is huge when you're in such a vulnerable state.
She's really not that bad, I think it was just that I was really worrying about possibly delivering in the car on the way to the hospital when it's about 45 minutes away on a good day. If I go into labour during rush hour, it could take an hour or more. And she did say that contractions start out very far apart and are more tolerable and whatever I do don't time the contractions right away because it'll just make it seem longer. She said she's had a lot of women who start having contractions at night and they start timing it immediately, getting really excited. But then they end up not sleeping through the night and when active labour starts they're exhausted, and that's the time when they really need all the energy they can get.
With my next baby I will go the midwife route again, but I'll be choosing another practice just because this one is so far away and has absolutely no parking. We have to park on the street a block or two away, it's a real pain.
|Everyone is different on Dec 16, 2014 @ 08:51 am|
My first child was born after 19 hours of labour but my friend's first child was born after 3 hours of labour. Everyone is different. There is absolutely no possible way to guess how your labour will go. Odds are that it will take longer for your first baby but there is no way to tell. Don't stress about it, it wont help anyway. Whatever happens happens. If you deliver your baby in a car, so beit... women are built to have babies and have been doing it without doctors for thousands of years.
Ali de Bold
|Ask your Mom on Dec 16, 2014 @ 12:26 pm|
Everyone is different. I have a friend who laboured for 2-3 hours (at 37 weeks) for both of her kids and had very easily deliveries. Then there are people like me that went for 2 days and ended in c-section.
I would ask your Mom (or sisters) what their experiences were like. Chances are they'd be the closest to what you could expect. But that is no guarantee. Age is also a big thing. The younger you are the easier birth seems to be. For example, my Mom and older sister were both young Moms (in their early - mid 20s) and had very normal experiences. My other sister and I had babies in our 5-10 years later and have had a harder time of it.
The best thing you can do is try not to worry about it. Everyone worries a lot about the birth, but really no matter how hard or easy it is, it doesn't take long to forget and it's so worth it when you see your little buddy for the first time.
Take care of yourself, take bubble baths, long walks, sleep a lot and just prepare your house as much as possible. When you come home you will be really tired and won't have the energy for folding onesies ;)
|thanks on Dec 16, 2014 @ 12:42 pm|
Thanks for the stories ladies. I'm just trying to prepare myself for all possibilities, c-section, induction, 4 hour labour or 3 day labour. I just don't want to close anything off as being impossible, and then be blind sided by it later.
My mom was in her late 20s I think when she had my brother. She then had a full term still birth, and then me. All of us exactly 3 years apart. She said with both the labour was long and painful, but vaginal. With me they had to give her a c-section because the cord was around my neck. She also had major problems with breast feeding, saying something about how her milk was like poison and making my brother really sick. But she also smoked a pack a day, and my husband tells me not to compare myself to her in the least since I'm still in my mid 20s and have only had to experience second hand smoke for the first 20 years of my life (but I haven't smoked personally ever).
I just came from my midwife appointment today and found out that I'm due 4 days earlier than I thought because my last date (the 27th) was based off my period, and my new date (23rd) is based off the ultrasound I had. I guess they just forget to tell me the new date. But at least I'm already 1cm dilated, same as last week, but apparently baby's head is a lot lower and my cervix is definitely more thin than last week. So here's hoping I deliver before the new year. Thankfully my mom is coming up early in that week to be here for the birth and to help out around the house and with cooking for a few weeks after. That'll be a nice break for sure.
Ali de Bold
|Sounds good! on Dec 16, 2014 @ 12:46 pm|
It sounds like everything is in the best possible position right now. Yay!
Yes, you being younger and a non-smoker is a lot different than when your Mom had you so ignore my last comment and don't compare ;)
And yep, breastfeeding is hard. There are some forum threads here about that too. Don't be hard on yourself though. You do the best you can and just focus on loving your little sweetheart.
Good luck, you will do great!
|my first labor on Mar 26, 2015 @ 04:46 pm|
I was due January 28th but my son had absolutely no intentions of coming into this world! So 9 days after his due date I was induced...The whole process only took about 6-7 hours. The only pain medication I had was a shot of Gravol and Morphine which was horrible, all I wanted to do was sleep and it made me sick. I couldn't get comfortable and had all back labor and no matter which position I tried it seemed to make it worse. Finally the moment came and my little man arrived at 4:28pm on February 6th 2006...I don't remember a lot of the delivery since the meds made me groggy. This was the best day of my life.
|turned out my first labour went horrible on Mar 26, 2015 @ 07:33 pm|
So I managed to get through my labour, but it was a hell of an experience that I won't recover from for at least another 2 years.
I was due on December 23. I was induced January 3rd at 4pm. Contractions started at 7, and got hella worse by 8. I had horrible back labour and contractions came on strong with no break between them. I went like this for 4 hours and then I finally had to succumb to the epidural because the contractions and pain were getting worse and the midwives said I had a very long labour ahead of me. Epidural went well and I was pain free after that.
I got fully dilated by 10am the next day, but nothing happened for several hours after that. By about 2pm or so they upped my contractions and lowered the epidural to try to get my labour moving. I still wasn't feeling my contractions, but then I started having terrible pain in the left lower side of my back. It caused my whole body to seize up. My husband later compared it to watching someone get shocked by a defibrillator, with the way their whole body convulses on the table. The pain was absolutely horrible and lasted for about 2 hours, even after they upped the epidural. They finally found a medication that worked and fed that through an IV for me. While that medication finally made me pain free, I had a 2 hour window before it wore off to push. By the 4 hour mark the pain was back and even more intense, and I had only succeeded in having my son's mop of hair visible.
I was told there was a pelvic blockage and I could either continue pushing without any pain medication and risk breaking his bones (not that I could push anyway since I was back to convulsing on the table in pain), or get a c-section. So I went the c-section route.
At the time, c-section went very well, or so I thought. My son was born at 8lbs, 1 ounce and 16" long.
I had all of two weeks with him before I started getting high fevers and my stomach was very hard and red (my incision looked great and was healing well). I then proceeded to go in and out of the hospital several times over the course of a week. The leader of the infectious disease control declared I had cullulosis (or something that sounded like this, it was nothing serious she said) so she would send me home after completing a treatment with IV antibiotics that would last 24 hours and I was to come in the next day for another treatment.
After the second treatment and being sent home with medication, the next day I had dark purple patches underneath my belly button. When I went in for treatment again the doctor said it was nothing, just the incision letting out some blood and it was nothing serious. Just let her know if it worsens.
That same night I went home and had the highest fever yet at about 105 and started hallucinating. We called paramedics and discovered my heart was racing so hard that they were very concerned. I got rushed to the hospital. This was on January 18th. For several days after I had fevers in the 101 range and the dark purple was getting worse.
On January 25th while I was in the hospital bed, my husband and I started to smell something foul. Turns out, it was the smell of dead flesh. The nurses assured us it was the smell of the infection leaving my system from my incision which at the time was leaking. That night a surgeon was called in to go over my file just to make sure nothing was missed. He immediately saw my chart and declared I had flesh eating disease and I was to be transferred immediately to another hospital where he would perform surgery to remove the infected and dead flesh. Later I found out from my husband that he had been told by the surgeon that I had been 6 hours away from death.
I was in ICU and it was touch and go for 3 days. I don't remember at all my time there, just near the end when I was starting to feel a little better. It was a relief to get the big air tube out of my throat and progress to the little nose pieces. From there I went to the stepdown ward and I had to get subjected to horrifically painful bandage changes every 3 days. Thankfully these got a lot easier as I healed further.
On February the 9th I finally went home and since then I've progressed to only needing a nurse to come and check my wound once a week, instead of the 3 day cycle of bandage changes I was first discharged with.
I got a tennis ball size amount of muscle taking out of my stomach. They reopened my initial incison, so I will only have one scar, but it will be much longer than the initial one. I also have a scar about an inch or two up, parallel to my belly button that finally closed over a week ago. It had been a chunk of flesh that had to be taken out as it was dead. So the infection had spread up that far. Thankfully nothing else inside was damaged that I know of. But the doctors do say it will take 2 years to fully recover, for all the swelling to go down and my insides to be healed completely. And they don't know if I'll ever be able to lift the same amount of weight as I used to, or if I'll always struggle. As of now, I'm finding it very hard to lift my 14.5 pound son, and I am very weak all over. I lost a lot of muscle while lying in that hospital bed for so long.
I am thankful that my son is perfectly healthy and happy, and I just have to be patient with myself on this very long road to recovery.
|Well... on May 01, 2015 @ 08:20 pm|
I had a very long labour with my first and only child, but it was not gruelling, it was just long and painful, but not exhausting (therefore not gruelling in my opinion). My labour started just like in a movie, what broke at 38 weeks in the middle of the night and contractions soon after and it just dragged out from there. It was not a completely smooth ride and 37 hours later I delivered naturally. For me it was more a marathon, long and steady with the odd mile that was scary but all worked out well in the end.