Kid having trouble with a friend


Long story short, my 7 year old girl has been friends with another little girl of the same age since they both were 1. This little girl has been a special part of our lives for 6 years and her and my daughter used to play together tons and be very close and friendly.

Fast forward to about age 5, little girl learns how to cry and throw horrendous fits to get her own way and sadly, mom gives in with the promise of toys, candy and special outings EVERY single time. This kid uses this tactic all the time - 'I don't want to go to school or daycare or swimming lessons'. It has now progressed to 'I won't go to my friends houses UNLESS mommy goes OR I get a special treat'. When we see them at the park, school, etc and I say hi to little girl she ignores me(yet she's known me her whole life) or makes a face at me or sticks out her tongue. She has extended this treatment to my daughter, saying she won't play with her unless I take them to McDonalds, get Slurpees, etc. At school she has become a bully towards my daughter in an emotional way. She's also in the 'mean girl' crowd, yes even grade 1 and 2 has mean girls. I've spoken calmly to her mom and her mother always says things like 'Oh, I know. She's such a character, isn't she' or 'She is who she is. I think it's nice that she wants me to tag along' or 'She's just so shy, she doesn't know how to treat others'. 

All of this is really bothering my daughter, who is a kind and loyal person by nature and even though this kid is hurting her feelings, she's determined to be her friend, partly because she doesn't want to lose a friend and partly because she feels obligated to her. 

It makes me sad for my kid because it truly bothers her a lot. I'm lost on what to say to her at times, any tips?
Apr 07, 2016 @ 03:59 pm

8 Replies


Oh wow

Sounds like the other little girl is a spoiled brat! It sucks that she is putting your daughter through that. I commend her loyalty to being a friend, but sometimes it's just healthier to let her go from her life.
It would be so tough at 7 years old to say "I don't like how you treat me. When you can treat me like a friend should treat a friend, we can hang around together again."
Apr 07, 2016 @ 04:13 pm


It sounds like a really big problem all right. That is a young age for this to be happening. It sounds like she needs disinclined at home not spoiling! Her parents are in for the time of their lives! I feel for you and your daughter I wonder what the teachers do when she starts to act up!
Apr 07, 2016 @ 04:14 pm


Yeah, I have told her to say something similar to that but at 7 it is SO hard for them. I just notice it taking a toll on her overall happiness and self esteem(not always but at times). She will ask me 'why doesn't so and so like me' and say how she's nice to other kids(mean girls at school) but not her. IT's just so frustrating that this mother fawns over he kids bad behaviour.
Apr 07, 2016 @ 04:17 pm


She is quite sneaky at school about her being mean to my daughter and a select few girls. My daughter told me that she waits until the teachers are busy elsewhere or does it at recess or on the bus. She's quite a sneaky one with this stuff. I have talked to one teacher but she looked at me like I was insane and said "so and so is never like that'. But, there is one teacher who is noticing little things, so hopefully they can catch it and maybe she will improve.

It is very sad because who knows what kind of ride her parents are in for when she's a teenager!
Apr 07, 2016 @ 04:20 pm


I know exactly how you feel,my daughter experienced the same thing ,she was bullied too
Apr 07, 2016 @ 04:29 pm


You obviously can't get any satisfaction from the mother, so I would definitely direct it to the teacher and/or principal as there are counsellors there that can and should address the situation. This can be completely devastating and harmful for your daughter to have to experience this.
Apr 13, 2016 @ 04:01 pm


isnt it awful how some parents reward the bad behaviour, and think it's so cute? I agree with dollysgramma..I would speak to the teachers or school administration in confidence. Report what you/your daughter have may be helping this kid who lacks a lot of social skills.
Apr 13, 2016 @ 04:21 pm


I emailed the teacher on Friday but have not heard back. They have this week off school, so I imagine that I will hear back next week once school resumes. It's tough because this kid is so sly about how she does this and her mom is just the most charming and beautiful lady ever, until you get to know her. I've requested that they not be in the same class next year.
Apr 13, 2016 @ 05:12 pm

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