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does he want to get back


I've been seeing this guy who is 5 years younger than me and is soon
moving to New York. We broke up because he went traveling for 3 months
and wanted his freedom. He still calls me and says that he misses me
and sends me messages on facebook. Not sure if he wants to get back
together. But I can't stop checking facebook and seeing other girls
posts and who he is traveling with. I know he has been sleeping around
but I can't stop thinking about getting back together. I am also moving to New York so I still want to be his friend so there is a friendly face there.
Feb 22, 2009 @ 05:44 am

9 Replies


leave it alone

If he wants to be with you he will let it be known.Clearly - without any doubt. Besides, why would you want to be with someone who does not want to be with you if he doesn't. New York will be a new beginning for you.
Feb 23, 2009 @ 04:54 pm

If a guy wants to be with you...

he'll find a way to be with you. no ifs or buts about it!! it hurts and is kind of desolusioning (is that a word??) to think that you care so much, and the person who you thought also cared, simply doesn't. He switched his feelings off like the proverbial switch.... well can't explain that one girl, all i can say is, this falls under the category of something thats beyond your control, so all you can do is accept it and move on.

As far as seeing him in NYC, i don't think thats a good idea... your feelings for him and his disregard (or worse - his hot / cold behaviour) for you may end up causing you more pain than you're willing to handle. Not to mention it'll drag you down and not allow you to move on, get over him and discover the new and improved life waiting for you at new york :)

again, i know this hurts.. i know theres lots of whys etc... but when a guy doesn't care, you simply can't make him.

and people say women are complicated...ya rite.. lol :) good luck sweetie
Feb 23, 2009 @ 07:23 pm


Thanks for the advice but it's really hard to let go what should I do?
I'm picking him up from the airport and he will be in Perth for a month
before he goes to New York.
Feb 24, 2009 @ 05:21 am
Ali de Bold

Why are you picking him up from the airport?

If he wants to see you, I'd let him take a $50 cab and treat you to a nice dinner. If he is not willing to do that, there is no point in seeing him because then he is just using you for a free ride/place to say/person to shag.

Sorry to be blunt. I have no patience for those situations. A person plays hot/cold when they are not interested, but want to keep you around long enough to get what they want from the situation. This is not good for you at all and will do nothing but harm your self esteem.

It will be hard to put into practice but I think you should consider it and try your best. The worst case scenario is, you are his taxi service, his hotel and his booty call. I'd rather be the one that was unavailable or the one that he took to dinner.
Feb 24, 2009 @ 02:38 pm

uh huh...

I would NOT pick him up from the airport, that is what cabs are for.
Feb 24, 2009 @ 04:30 pm

I agree!

I've been the "cab driver" and the "place to stay" and the .... well, never mind. But let me tell you ... IT SUCKS! It's very hard on the self esteem and devestating to the ego. You are worth more than that and you deserve so much more! He won't realize you are a great woman because you let him walk all over you... he will use you for your generosity and abuse your good nature.

If he really cares about you, he will make the effort to come to you, he will call you, he will come pick you up.

I hope everything works out for you.

Feb 24, 2009 @ 05:37 pm

i really wish i knew...

you asked "but it's really hard to let go what should I do?" .... girl i really wish i knew.. anyone have any insight on that? i could really use that peice of advise myself :-)
Feb 24, 2009 @ 08:14 pm


i guess you guy are right because he is already planning to meet up with the girls he met while overseas and he said that he was just making connections so he could have a place to stay when travelling
Feb 27, 2009 @ 05:39 am

Please tell me you said no

Apple23 I hope you told him you changed your mind about picking him up at the airport and that he can't stay with you. I wouldn't even want to associate with someone like that who is using people, let alone have him in my bed. Be strong, girl!
Feb 27, 2009 @ 01:46 pm

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