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Families Opinions--should they matter??


OK so here's the jist of my situation without going into too much 'personal' information. I've been dating my boyfriend for over 2 years now, we do have a baby together (my second child, his first). I got pregnant pretty early into our relationship (which came as a HUGE shock to both of us and 'magically' kind of happened LOL). Anyways, my entire family does not care for him, although they have given him the benefit of the doubt so to speak, I could tell they still didnt care for him to the point where my sister just would not talk to him anytime she was around. They think he is controlling, manipulative and so on...although I see it, I AM in love with him and although we tend to argue quite a bit, we want to make it work for the kids. Don't get me wrong, I AM a smart girl who was brought up with strong values and morals and won't let myself be treated like garbage or walked all over so I know when enough is enough. In September, I did finally call it quits for various reasons, but have recently gotten back together SECRETLY and I am dreading the day when my family does end up finding out if I do not tell them before that. Sooo my question to everyone is, just HOW important should your families opinions be?? It makes for such an awkward situation around my family when I know their true feelings, but when they are talking to me one on one, its a constant battle of why I am still with him...UGH!
Dec 19, 2011 @ 08:29 pm

2 Replies


Family Matters

I personally think the opinion of your family is very important. They want the best for you and they have valid reasons why they disapprove of him which you see for yourself. But you should tell them you are back together with him before they find out.. it would make things easier for both sides. Although their opinion is important, it is just an opinion and you are free to make whatever decisions you think are best for you and they will just have to understand and accept that. But you also have to understand and accept that they have already given him the benefit of the doubt and their feelings about him may not ever change. Your family will always love you and be there for you regardless.
Dec 19, 2011 @ 08:51 pm
Ali de Bold

SO important

I know it sucks if your family doesn't approve of your man but their opinions should matter to you a lot. They know you more than anyone and love you unconditionally. There is no other group of people more interested in your well being than they are. Yes, it's your life and you will end up with whomever you choose but their opinions should matter to you. If they've got it wrong about him, help them see that by letting them spend more time with him. If they've already spent plenty of time with him and feel that way, you may want to consider if they are right about him. Sorry you are in this position but especially since you have children, it's more important than ever to be with the right person. Whether that's him or someone else. Big hugs!
Dec 19, 2011 @ 09:19 pm

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