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How do I know if this guys is really into me?


so i have a b/f and a kid with him but sometimes i feel like there is someone better out there and that we are just together because of our kid...he has cheated on me and hurt me and i think i resent him for him cause now i know he loves me and wants to marry me but i'm not so sure!

I've know this other guy for like maybe 2 years he is one of my brothers good friends. He has seemed like he has been interested for awhile now but sometimes when i text him he won't text me back at all or random night he will text me when he is in a bar. (we don't hardly talk at all...like see eachother maybe 4 times a year) but he text me about a month ago when he was at a bar and then just seen him at a party at my brothers friday night and he was drunk but said some stuff as if he was interest in me...such you know i like you and was texting me to dance (but i was tooo sober for that) he ALWAYS is making eye contact and making jokes about my "lame" b/f and always ask about my kid like he cares. I always get like giddy to see him and when he text but i don't want to say something stupid and make things awkward when we do see eachother...

I SOO badly just want to text him and ask him if he is but don't want to be so blunt about it...? any idea?

I would never cheat on my b/f because i know what it feels like but what if this guy is "the better one" ive been waiting for...(p.s) i'm a major what if person and i think i would always wonder! My bday is coming up in a few weeks so i was thinking bout asking if he wants to go out with me and celebrate for that...???

Thanks for reading and for the advice!!! sorry got kinda long!
Dec 14, 2009 @ 06:18 pm

5 Replies


i remembered more to the story from friday night

So some of the guys from my high school graduating class just happened to stop by and one of them came over and was talking to me and "the guy" came running up behind me and was all worried and thought my classmate was trying to hit on me! and he was all jealous and wanted to know who he was and how i knew him!

I think its weird to not be interested in someone and get jealous because a guy is talking to them....also when he text me to dance I text him back no and said there are plenty of girls out dancing he could go dance with one of them but he never did!
Dec 14, 2009 @ 06:29 pm


it doesn't seem like this man is willing to commit. I take it you are young and it sounds like he just wants to go around and party and sleep around. He's not ready.
Dec 27, 2009 @ 09:37 pm

don't rush into anything

No one should stay in a hurtful, destructive relationship. However, you should also think long and hard about walking away from your current bf and father of your child. Consider too that whatever you do will affect your child, stay or go.

I think you should worry less about what may or may not be happening with this new guy. What you should focus on right now is the future (or end) of your existing relationship. You will do yourself, your BF, your child, and the potential BF a huge harm if you don't first resolve what you're involved in right now. Don't bring that kind of baggage into a new relationship!

From the side, I think this new guy is little more than a symptom of your suffering relationship. Try really hard to look at the big picture here - I know that's easier said than done.

Best of luck to you! Sorry if this sounds harsh :)
Dec 28, 2009 @ 10:26 am

Not interested

If he was at all interested trust me honey you will know. I am also a mother to a 21 month old. I'm engaged, not yet married but I had a baby young and often times I question whether or not I made the right decision on who I chose to be the father of my child. After all, its someone your going to have to deal with for the rest of your life, like it or not. Its not just legal papers but someone who's blood circulates within your child's. When it comes down to it, a relationship is what you make of it. If your interested in making it work, it always will. If not then don't waste time. cut to chase and stop waiting for something else better..Yes life is full of surprise's but rather than waiting for a miracle, make it happen. Although I dont know who you are but I trust that your a wonderful mother and in the end what matters most is your child. I personally don't think its wise for you to make a move. If he was at all interested in you he would've initiated a long time ago. Being an experienced mom doesn't intimidate men, it only scares them away. You shouldn't have to initiate for noone but your baby. If they like you, has accepted you as a mother and loves your child, honey you'd be on the stairway to heaven already.
Jan 14, 2010 @ 09:20 am

^^ what she said

HappyWife said something really important: "If you're interested in making it work, it always will."

Naturally, that assumes that the man is also interested in making it work! But the point is, love is a decision, not an emotion. Like/lust is an emotion. Your child will be healthiest and happiest if two loving parents make their relationship a priority. I heard a speaker say "the best gift a father can give his child is to love the mother". Absolutely true, and the same goes for mothers.

Don't focus on this new guy, at least not until things are settled once-and-for-all with the father of your child. You love your baby, so do what's best for him/her :)
Jan 14, 2010 @ 12:51 pm

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