the lies told

Lotus Flower

its been awhile since i have been on chick advisor. the last time i was here i asked u girls for advice on my emotionally abusive relationship and u girls were very helpful. i must say i am in dire need of some advice. things went from bad to worse. After my ex left me he started seeing another woman but would always lie about her. that she was just "a friend". i didnt believe him and tried moving on with my life because i sensed this man was lying and doing it straight into my eyes. i think he was being selfish and wanted us both because after two months of not talking to me. he suddenly starts calling and texting me saying how he made a big mistake. i asked him again what happened to his girlfriend and yet agian he lied and said "she was just a friend and nothing more". he even said he was a changed man and all. but my instincts told me he is still lying. he started acting like he cared and all and 4 two months was pursuing me. on thursday however i went 4 a wedding and he joined me and my family after 4 a drink. during this time everything was fine until my sister asked him why we broke up and all. the guy goes on saying we are working on things and that we are in the proces of getting back together and that he loves me. I dunno what got into me but i told him if u truly love me call ur so called friend and tell her that ur with me. thats when he panicked and said his phones battery is dead. i then told him fine..give me ur sim card and i will find a phone to call her with. by now the man was sweating. so i knew i had to call this "friend" and find out the truth. so when i call she answers the phone saying " hey babe" i ask r u so and so's g/f?. she says yes. i ask how long have u been going out she says "almost a year". i told her..."ur man is here claiming his undying love for me". nway my ex ran off into the night. and the next morning calls me and says i am delusional and crazy because he has never called or asked me 4 a second chance...nor has he ever told me he loves me....i asked him about about all the loving texts u used to send me( which i still have). the man syas he has NEVER sent me anything and i should stop lying. i was beyond hurt. this man has turned it around and made it look like i am carzy and that i made everything up. i lost 2 kids with this man. two kids. how does one recover from this???
Dec 14, 2009 @ 01:24 am

4 Replies


forget him.

hey there,

I recently read your posting about your man. you deserve so much better. I went through the same thing almost. I dated a guy and we were engaged. He thought the grass would be greener on the other side and started talking to someone else and we ended up breaking up. Well he figured out pretty quickly that there are always ups and downs in every relationship and now 6 years later keeps telling me he loves me and that I am his soul mate. But I just say whatever..... I moved on. You can too. Take the relationship as a lesson learned. Remember the good times and the bad and use them as a stepping stone to your next relationship. You are a strong smart woman. You can tell by doing the sim card thing and confronting the girl. Hes a coward and so doesnt deserve you. You will find a man that deserves a smart strong woman. And you will wonder what you ever saw in the guy from the past. He lost out and he will realize it. someone better is out there for you.
Dec 14, 2009 @ 02:41 am
Ali de Bold

Not relationship material

I'm going to be brutally honest. This guy doesn't sound remotely like relationship material. You don't trust him for good reason. I would cut all ties to him and move on. The right relationship for you will never need to be this complicated.
Dec 14, 2009 @ 03:25 pm

To the Left

I happen to catch your posting and I couldn't agree more with the others. I would take a Soprano's approach to this one - act like he never existed - he's dead to you!

You can only truly ride off into the sunset if you hold-out for a man with character. Honesty, integrity, respect.

I'd also listen to your family, often they tell you whats in your best interest.

Character is what you build a future on and if you love and respect yourself, you should stick to those qualities no matter what.

I'm single and i'm holding out, i know it can be hard. At the same time however I don't want to squander my singleness...there are many things to do, interests to delve into when you're won't have that time when you get into a serious relationship and start a family.

Dec 16, 2009 @ 09:11 pm

d-bag alert!

This guy is a major douche. Leave him to rot in his lies and emotional abuse. You don't need this hassle. Honestly this guy is a scum bucket and needs to be as far away from you as possible. It's gonna be hard but you need to change all of your contact information so this f-tard cannot keep coming back to hurt you. You need to move on and find someone who will treat you well.

At times moving on and finding someone worth while seems like all baloney and such but over time it happens for everyone who is willing to let them be happy. So before you can find someone great you just need to brush yourself off and be happy on your own. As soon as you can get your stuff together on your own someone will come out of the woodwork to share the good with you.

I wish you the best and I know you will be strong and happy in no time!
Dec 27, 2009 @ 09:34 pm

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