Why does he say anything?

on Oct 30, 2011 @ 10:55 pm

My ex broke up with me in the summer. It was a devastating and awful break up to say the very least. It involved lies, another girl, and him hurting me more then I have ever hurt in my life. He knew I didn't want the break up and how hurt I was the last time we spoke. Since then I have heard from him 3 times...1) when he left me a voicemail of a concert 2) about a concert ticket he left for me at will call to a concert we were suppose to go to together 3) Said "happy Birthday" . All three were over about a 4 month period. I know that I am not over my heart break but why does he say ANYTHING to me. Does he think that HE DID NOT CRUSH me? he would have to literally be insane to think that......

I havent responded at all, and i havent said a word to him since the F*cked up break up.


5 Replies

Guilty! on Oct 31, 2011 @ 10:50 am

He probably feels guilty about the breakup and from what you've mentioned, he probably rightfully should. I think reaching out to you, is way of trying to make himself feel better about the break up.

You're doing the right thing by keeping out of his life. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of feeling better about what he did.

Other than that, it could be that he wants to get back together but that's bad news right there!

agree on Oct 31, 2011 @ 11:17 am

I agree with AlexJC - he's probably feeling badly about how things ended and is trying to make up for it. I don't think I'd go so far as to assume he wants to get back together - 3 communications in 4 months is not THAT much. It sounds more like he wants to make sure you don't hate him.

If this, like any other toxic relationship (ex best friend, family member, etc), is making you feel worse, just ignore it. Don't engage by responding - even to say "get lost" is still continuing the conversation. Eventually he'll get the message.

Makeup Guru Emily
Agree on Oct 31, 2011 @ 03:24 pm

Weird...it sounds like he's a very poor communicator. I agree with mamaluv and AlexJC, it's probably best to just ignore it.

Ali de Bold
Regret on Nov 01, 2011 @ 08:47 am

I agree with everyone else. I think he regrets what he did to you so he is trying to do nice things for you every now and then. It could also be a way to keep himself on your radar. I think your approach of not responding is best. Take the time you need to heal and get over the breakup. Big hugs!

Agree on Nov 08, 2011 @ 04:18 pm

I agree as well...he probably feels bad about how things ended and still 'wants to be friends' - bah!. Men are also not very bright when it comes to emotions - he could be unclear about just how much your still hurting from the break up.
I think your doing the right thing by not responding. He won't try too many more times to reach out to you, if he's not getting any response.
Hang in there!!

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