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Home from the Hospital

R3Bean

I have just gotten home from a huge surgery and Im not to do anything for 6 weeks.   I dont want sympathy Im only asking because my husband is helpless.  This man who I love and adore is really dumb when it comes to me being sick.     Its been 1 week and Im finally out of bed and can do stairs on my own.  Where do they get off thinking that they are superman?    Im really thinking about writing a what to expect after surgery for the women out their...   Im wondering if anyone has experienced this too?
Mar 17, 2017 @ 01:47 pm

12 Replies

Anonymous

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i guess some men are like that. The men in my family are so supportive and always have been. I'm not married it might be different if I was. I feel for you I've had a few surgeries and have had so much support from my family I don't know what I would do if I didn't. Hopefully he will understand sooner than later
Mar 17, 2017 @ 02:46 pm
R3Bean

Home from the hospital

Thank you I know if I had my mom closer It would help tons.. My family support is lacking because of distance. I find that it make a huge distance..
Mar 17, 2017 @ 03:51 pm
Anonymous

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thats really sad when you need help and support. Do you have any female friends close by that could drop over that might help you?
Mar 17, 2017 @ 08:14 pm
fly_eyez

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Guys can be clueless. I find you have to come right out and say what you need rather than have them pick up what you're laying down.
Feel better doll!
Mar 17, 2017 @ 10:45 pm
jujusamples

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Sorry to hear you have to endure this pain all by yourself. I hope you will have a speedy recovery!
Mar 18, 2017 @ 01:26 am
DEANENE

On March 18,2017 @ 10;04 am

I'm so sorry to hear that you had surgery and that you don't have any help hope you feel better soon take care
Mar 18, 2017 @ 06:06 am
MelRichard

Oh no!

You poor thing. I hope that your recovery is super speedy!

In my experience, men aren't the greatest when we are sick/out of commission. They lack the "nurturing" that we women have. A few years back, I broke my leg and arm badly and had to have surgery on both to put them back together with metal rods, plates and bolts. I was out of commission for MONTHS.

I spent the first two weeks LIVID at my husband because he "didn't help enough". He would just leave me laying in the bedroom and do his own thing. Turned out, I needed to be more vocal. When I started ASKING for help, he ALWAYS came through - but I had to ask! I really found my voice during that time because asking for help was a completely new experience for me.

My mom and my best friend were a huge help during that time. They helped me do things like my hair, bra, etc.

Have you tried talking to your husband about how you feel? Asking when you need help? (Men really aren't mind readers!) Also - any great women in your life that can come help out? Those are my biggest suggestions for you, speaking from experience.

Best wishes R3Bean and here's to a complete and quick recovery!

Mar 19, 2017 @ 06:01 am
R3Bean

Oh No

Thank you MelRichard.. Its been a week of me bring hoome. Its getting easier and the stairs I now can do on my own. You are right the more vocal I am the more he does. When hes around and not working


We as women have a more nurturing side..
Mar 19, 2017 @ 01:02 pm
whohow

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My advice is to ask for EXACTLY what you want. If you take that as the starting point, it might make it a little easier to deal with. Their nurturing side might be lacking, but that doesn't mean they don't want to be helpful.
*Sending all the best your way :) *
Mar 19, 2017 @ 08:29 pm
danaorgnero

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I have to agree with several of the other chicks. Tell him exactly what you want. My husband can be a bit clueless at times and has told me a lot that I just need to tell him what it is that I need from him. He doesn't not do things to be a jerk, sometimes he legit just doesn't get it. I wish you a speedy recovery!
Mar 20, 2017 @ 02:04 pm

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