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Older guy...


I recently started seeing an older guy.. we have been together for almost a year, I am 22 and he's 49 I know this might seem fucked up, and if anybody knew we would be hated for it. I really do love him and he loves me and I know he cares a lot about me. every time I've been in trouble he has been there and helped me through everything. thank god for these masks I can walk around with him not caring cause people wouldn't recognize me if they have seen me with him anyways. we get some stares before but at this point, it's the last thing I care about. I always want to be with him but our age gap is stupid and there's no way I can be with him. my family would never be okay with this I would be disowned. we work together it's hard enough acting like nothing goes on but whenever we can we kiss and it feels so right. is there something wrong with me for loving an older man?
Nov 22, 2020 @ 12:52 am

9 Replies



I'm with a man 9.5 years my senior. We've been together 20 years. While yours is a bigger age gap, only you two can decide if your relationship is worth it or not. There will always be haters, no matter if you're together 2 minutes or 20 years. Pick your path and travel it.
Nov 22, 2020 @ 11:09 am


As long as you are both consenting adults and there is no one in a position of power over the other (so he's not your boss or teacher or someone else who would have authority over you), it is no one's business but your own and age shouldn't matter.

If he treats you well and clearly cares for you, then who cares what anyone else thinks? It is up to you to decide who should be in your life.

My sister-in-law's husband is 20 years older than her. At first her parents were really upset by the age difference. Then they got to know him, saw how well he treated their daughter and how happy they were together. They love him now and they have been married for 19 years.
Nov 23, 2020 @ 08:27 am


I say each to their own If you are happy in a relationship age does not matter and should not be a concern to others as it is your business. I am on the other side of the coin because I prefer younger guys
Jan 08, 2021 @ 08:32 pm
Christine Kempt


I think that people who comp!ain are not happy in their own relationships and deflect. If it is supposed to be, it will be. You have to be ok with it because you are the one in the relationship
Feb 11, 2021 @ 09:07 am

Age Difference

My husband is 11 years older than myself and we are very happy together. That being said age difference can work however you need to be sure he wants to be with you full time. Is he willing to meet your parents and has he introduced you to his family? A real relationship does not need to be hidden if everyone is really serious about it. You don’t need our approval, you need yours.
Feb 12, 2021 @ 06:47 pm

Nope. Nothing Wrong at All

No; of course not. You know, our society is VERY messed up about most everything to do with sex, traditions, and wrong versis right There is no one in the whole wide world whom every human being will say is "perfect" for you. I'm 75. I was divorced twice. I have lived common-law with two other women. (One at a time; one at a time; c'mon! Or I'd be dead by now!) I was raised very conservatively and strictly, but here is the way I see things today:

—If you love someone, ANYONE, and that is the person you most absolutely find joy and happiness being with, go for it. It's not really an age or sexuality question. You can be madly in love with ANY other entity. Remember that marriages once implied an intention to have kids. Now, not so much. BE WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE, and if he is a motmot or a crocodile, so be it. The more unusual your relationship, though, the more flac you'll get--from people who were never true to themselves, and now are very critical of others who radiate genuine happiness. Good luck
Mar 25, 2021 @ 10:12 pm

Age Dilemma

If you are both as happy, no problem However, you may have to face a reality check firther down the line....You are still young, he is not ancient but what about children? Are you ok with having an older father or because we live in the real world, your significant other getting ill or worse? Think long and hard
May 08, 2021 @ 09:35 pm

If you both love each other than its all fine.

As long you are both adults, and you love each other, than its all fine. If he has been there in your up and downs, and vide versa, and you will stay together for a life, than yes. It is fine.
May 10, 2021 @ 08:35 pm


Nothing wrong with it as long as you are both happy and want the same things in life
May 11, 2021 @ 11:13 am

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