The past seven days have officially been Ex-Boyfriend Week.

Ex-Boyfriend Week is a magical time when former loves suddenly reappear in your e-mail inbox, text messages or Facebook feed, trying to see if the space they had formerly occupied in your life has been filled.

It’s as if every time I kiss a boy on the mouth, I equip him with a radar that alerts him when I’ve begun to see somebody new (more on that later, maybe).

Usually, these are benign check-ins.  This week featured a text message telling me that a trip to Pittsburgh had reminded him of me (REALLY?!), an e-mail asking how I’ve been, and a Facebook post with a funny link.

Now, I am open to love in all of its forms: friendship, puppies, little babies, lifelong lovers and newlyweds. I’m also a firm believer in boundaries, but unfortunately the Internet doesn’t care about that and delivered me a friend request from the boy whose breakup preceded my exit from New York City.

Nearly a year and a half have gone by since we parted ways and probably 8 months since we last spoke.  In that time I’ve loved again and again, I’ve broken hearts and almost broke my arm once (which is unrelated but completely badass). I’ve created the life I wanted to have and filled it with people and experiences that make me wake up thankful every day.

The friend request didn’t come with an apology or even hello.  It signified that he was simply requesting access to a peephole into my life, no interaction required.  That’s hardly friendship, even with an Internet definition.

As much as I believe in an abundance of love, I believe that I have a finite amount of emotional real estate, and there simply just isn’t any more space available for a passive observer.

Friend request rejected.

How do you deal with exes after a breakup?

by Nora McInerny