As grown-ups, we see the meaning of important events change over the years. Christmas becomes less about receiving and more about giving.  The end of summer is less about back to school and more about the September Vogue. Halloween is less about candy and more about dressing up as a sexy version of something decidedly unsexy.

Perhaps a sexy Polar Bear? You’ll look hot even as you tear a family of penguins limb from adorable limb.  Or a sexy Ghostbuster?  Somewhere, Bill Murray is crying about this.

Except for a brief stint as a “sexy schoolgirl” freshman year of college (one of many mistakes I made that year), Halloween is a time for me to look like a complete idiot with the unsexiest last-minute costumes I can find.

Behold...

2007-2008: M&M Hipster.  Originally intended for an 8-10 year old boy, I cut a little extra room in the arms to make it a tunic.  The polyester shell kept me toasty warm and served as a nice cushion for when I fell on my face walking into the party.

2009: Not-so-hot dog.  Originally intended for a large dog (really), I paired it with a denim shirt to hide that fact that I couldn't fasten one of the straps over my muffin top.  By coincidence, I met this hot-dog man and forced him into an impromptu photoshoot.

2010: Polygamists. Denim jumpers originally intended for 5th-grade teachers in 1991, paired with baby pink turtlenecks.  We won Best Female Costume but didn’t have an acceptance speech prepared.  Bonus: every man we met that night was definitely going to like us for our personalities.


How did you dress for Halloween this year?

by Nora McInerny