Dear New Moms,

don't kill the messenger. Also, you're welcome (keep reading to see why).

Sincerely, Claire

A new study from the University of Toronto's School of Nursing has found that common sleeping tips and tricks do not have a measurable increase in the number of sleep hours a new mom and her baby will get during the first 12 weeks after birth. The same study also found that these methods did not improve maternal depression, fatigue, or breastfeeding issues either. 

The researchers used relaxation techniques, self-soothing methods, schedules, and more. Mothers and babies wore wrist and ankle monitors to measure their sleep times.

Where's the silver lining? This report may just be your get-out-of-jail-free card when nosey neighbours offer unsolicited feedback on how poorly you're sleep-managing your newborn. 

So what can sleep-deprived parents do to make the best of a difficult time? Try these 7 common-sense tips to cope:

#1 - Make time for quality sleep

Cat naps of 20 minutes seem like a good solution during daylight hours without taking extra time from your schedule, but a full sleep cycle is actually closer to 90 minutes. Since your nights are frequently interrupted, take advantage of a proper cycle whenever you have the opportunity. Fragmented sleep is inefficient and has been compared to sleep disorders, so quality naps are not a luxury - they are a medical necessity.

#2 -  Consider Co-Sleeping

Here's where it gets controversial, people. I co-slept with my babies during nap times and it made all the difference between a full nap cycle and a brief teaser. When I wasn't able to lie down with my baby, I put a nightshirt in the crib with her so she could still smell me. It wasn't always 100% effective, but it did help some. There are experts who criticize co-sleeping and others who praise it, so as always, use your best judgment and if you decide to co-sleep, find out how you can manage it more safely.

#3 - Be Wary of Cues
 
Baby's poor sleeping habits could be a simple adjustment period or a sign of physical discomfort. In the same way, your sleeping habits could be a product - or even cause of - medical issues of your own. If you have concerns, document them on paper as they happen so that your doctor can identify patterns and, hopefully, solutions. 

Just like your birthing plan evaporated during the first few hours of labour, set aside your preconceptions for how the first few months should be and accept them as they are. Don't be ashamed if your doctor recommends medication or counseling sessions if there's a chance you may be experiencing postpartum depression.

#4 - Moderate the House Temperature

New parents often worry about babies taking a chill and will dress them in extra layers or crank up the thermostat. Babies (and parents!) sleep better in cooler temperatures, so turn down the heat at night or crack a window for a comfortable freshness. 

Personal tip: check for flushed cheeks and feel the back of Baby's neck to see if he's sweating. This is an indication he's too hot!

#5 - Limit Expectations

Always remember that a healthy and happy mom is what Baby needs most. Older kids want time with Mom too, but this is an opportunity for Uncle to go to a soccer game or Grandma to attend a band concert on your behalf. Take a pass on community volunteering or stressful family reunions and focus on recuperating from childbirth.

#6 - Accept Help

No kiddin', right? Such a new idea. 

Still, many of us worry that offers aren't sincerely meant or that accepting help shows weakness. Let your mom take the night shift once a week, your mother-in-law make a week's worth of casseroles, and your sister wash your laundry. Let co-workers bring you pizza, your Supermom best friend babysit while you nap, or your neighbour cut the grass and tackle the grocery run. Then pay it forward!

#7 - Budget for Paid Help
 
If you don't have close family or friends nearby or need additional support, put money aside during your pregnancy for short-term help, such as a cleaning service, a night nurse, or unpaid vacation time for Dad if necessary. When friends ask what to buy for shower gifts, don't be too shy to mention your savings goal. Chances are they'll jump at the chance to give you something you really need.

We're asking you:

Experienced Moms - which tricks did you try to help your babies sleep easier?
New Moms - which challenges are you finding most difficult?

Share your stories in the comments!